Monday, July 11, 2011

A few thoughts from this mom....

I have a lot on my mind today.  Saturday night there was a horrific car accident across the street from my home.  I live in a quiet neighborhood.  Kids on bikes.  Neighbors walking dogs.  It's a nice place to live. 
Long story short to start, 2 dads went to go get pizza for their little family party and died when their car crashed into my neighbors tree. 
I was putting my children to bed and it was HOT.  The airconditioners were on in the windows.  As I was kissing my little one good night, I heard the rev of an engine, rolled my eyes and hoped the kids outside weren't going to keep it up for too long.  My husband and I turned off their light and walked down the hall and sat down with cold beers in hand.  Just as we started watching TV my phone rang.  My neighbor.  I laughed - we had seen each other 3 times already today and I wondered what she had forgotten to tell me now. 
Christine was hysterical on the other end of the phone yelling, "WHY AREN'T YOU OUTSIDE??"  I jumped out of my chair and went to the front door and saw chaos as there were children crying, a woman trying not to collapse and another neighbor that volunteers with the fire department trying to get control of the situation and all the on lookers.  This was 3 minutes ago.  There were atleast 5 cop cars out there already. 
I threw the phone on the couch and ran across to my neighbor and she was shaking violently.  She was the only one that saw the crash.  Everyone heard it.  She saw it.
As I ran across to her I glanced at the car and I regret it.  I felt the passenger looking through me.  His eyes were open and they were black.  He had a shaved head.  His head was resting on the dashboard, his tattooed arms were just hanging there.  All of this in 1 nano second. 
Christine was just out of her mind.  She thought it was a couple of teenagers in a hot rod car speeding down our street.  She was sitting on her stoop painting her toenails when she looked up to see the noise and she said it was like an action movie.  She said that they made no attempt to steer the car away.  Her mind was racing with all of the "what if's".  Meanwhile her 10 year old and 5 year old boys were worried about her and trying to look outside.  I went in with them knowing that the EMT's and fire department were about to pry open the car.  No one should look at that. 
I always thought that being  a fire fighter (volunteer or paid), an EMT, nurses and doctors was such a noble thing.  When I think about what I saw, just for that very second, I don't know that I could see that daily.  These professionals that save our lives everyday deserve to honored every day.  Just as important as the soldiers that protect our lives every day, it's the docs, nurses, and emergency services that are there no matter what.  There was no hesitation.  These firefighters were using every ounce they had to crowbar the doors open, pull the windows out and get those men out.  I felt like they were gone in a flash. 
The scene stayed until after midnight.  I tried to close my eyes several times but I kept seeing his eyes.  The car is vividly pictured in my head. 
Sunday was almost as bad.  Mourners were coming through as early as 6AM.  Neighbors all walking down the street.  Teenagers holding hands and saying prayers for the friend's dad.  People pulling over in their cars and pausing, just for a moment, to have a thought.  Families supporting each other as they were sobbing, walking down the street from the passenger's house.  News 12 was out there for over an hour. 
Myself and Christine tried to help Marie clean up her yard.  There were shards of glass still in her driveway.  Her car was covered in gasoline.  The town still hasn't come by to clean up the mess of oil and gasoline in the street.  It's in a large pile of kitty litter/oil absorbing materials, glass,  and pieces of the car, next to the tree in the street. 
I imagine that it will be quite some time for the memory of mine to fade.  I will be reminded for a while to come with the tribute staring at my home.  My heart aches for the wives, children and families of both these men. 
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Anonymous said...

I have chills reading that. I am so sorry you saw that Wendie, I'll pour you some extra wine on Weds. =(

Kirsten said...

OMG Wendie .. I can understand how you feel ! It's hard being an EMS provider too. We all have feelings and emotions sometimes can run through us. Though our adrenaline is running through our body when we are on a scene, though once its over and the crowed is gone, the scene is cleaned and all is quiet is when it hits us. We start to think, see things in our minds we have never could have imagined.. though we know we have to keep going .. we have another call to answer and we do it!

I am so sorry you had to go through all that .. I send you hugs !

Do you know what happen ? Why they ended up in a tree ?

Hugs Kirsten

Anonymous said...

Wendie, the passenger in the car was Phil's "cousins" husband, Kevin De Maille (not blood cousin but by relationship - his parents were close friends with Kevin's wifes parents). We're going to his wake tonight and are really not looking forward to it. I'm so sorry you had to see that tragedy - I can't imagine how awful that was for you. I literally got chills when I heard the accident was on Bowdoin and immediately thought of you, Brian and the boys. I hope you're ok and getting through it. We are still in shock ourselves. On a MUCH happier note, the clothes for the boys are great! Jack already wore the gray tiny and tuff t-shirt and got so many compliments from his teachers. I will talk to soon...take care and please say hello to Brian and the boys :-)

Rachel Joy said...

What a scene to witness. I pray for peace and comfort for the families. It's almost unthinkable how fast a life can be taken. one moment you're getting pizza, the next...I hope everyone heals from this experience, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.

Laura said...

Oh my goodness, Wendie, I am so sorry. I can only imagine how terrible that image was. I've witnessed accidents before, but never have I stared into the face of a victim who has died. I hope that you can come to terms with this. said...

How horrible, I'm so sorry :( I can't even imagine. I've never witnessed anything like it and I can imagine it sticks with you... Praying for healing for all that are affected and touched by such a horrible accident :(

TyKes Mom said...

:-( So sad. I am keeping them and you in my prayers!

Christine said...

I am so so sorry that this happened to the families of those dads--and to all of you who had to witness it. It's scary how things changed so quickly from good to horrible. I hope you and your neighbors (and especially the families involved) will be able to find comfort and support during this time.

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