Friday, April 29, 2011


Well, actually, I reached 100 like 2 weeks ago. So, to celebrate, I asked my 100th follower to do a guest post for me and I think you're going to lover her! DG tells it like it is and doesn't care what you think. I like the way she thinks! Her blog, Diary of a Mad Bathroom, is beyond real and funny. Give her a read and then DEFINATELY give her a follow!

Oh, hi there! Allow me to introduce myself – my name is DG and I have a blog called Diary of a Mad Bathroom. And while I know that we just met, I’m going to let you in on a little secret – nobody ever asks me to guest post. Shocking, right? In spite of my long and spectacularly lackluster blogging career I have only ever been asked to guest post once before. So this makes today’s guest post, over here at Thoughts From This Mom, number TWO! Thanks to Wendie for taking a chance on an unknown kid!
Occasionally, I wonder what it is about me that would prevent these invitations from being extended. I have opened up my blog to many guest posters over the 2.5 years of my blog’s existence, offering them a platform to share their thoughts on cranky teenagers, abysmal family car trips other real life delights.
Now, I could talk myself into thinking that my lack of invitation is due to my fabulosity being far too intimidating for the average blogger and that they simply can’t handle this jelly, but that would be a ridiculous notion, even for someone as delusional as me. I could also surmise that I am probably not a good fit for most “Mommy Blogs” because my acid tongue and potty mouth could scare the fish away. Or maybe I just suck. I mean, I do write about knotted cat anuses and an obsessive love for Bobby Flay pottery. Not everyone’s cup of tea.
You would think that having all of this non-guest-posting time on my hands would allow me the opportunity to build an arsenal of guest posts, just waiting to be unleashed on a new reading public, but no, that would be far too practical and optimistic for me. So, what ends up happening when I finally get my big invite – I am suffering in the suffocating in the claustrophobic grip of my worst dry spell, ever. Yes, the inevitable appearance of the heinous three headed monster known as writer’s block has taken up residence in my castle. Sweet timing, huh? It’s a helpless feeling, like when the UPS man shows up with an important package that requires your signature and you are trapped on the toilet suffering the vengeance of a 7-11 bean burrito.
So what can I do to offer you some sort of evidence that I was possibly worthy of this invite? Do what any sidelined athlete or washed up Hollywood hag would do – go to my highlights reel. Here are a few of my favorite posts from days gone by. Have fun and please do stop by my place. Although I haven’t posted since April 15th, I am working hard to clear my mental constipation.
Oh, and I was wondering. . . do they make prune juice for the brain? Because right now, my cranium is more backed up than a geriatric on an all rice and cheese diet. Any suggestions would be welcome as this brain cramp is killing me.

Thursday, April 28, 2011

Retiring my Habit

Today was the last day of teaching first grade religion.
'Nuf Said!
Flirty Aprons


 Hosted by WAHM Resource Site
The button wasn't working for this one, so, please just follow the link for the IT'S ALMOST FRIDAY BLOG HOP!

ALSO, I found out yesterday afternoon that today was "Take your child to work" day. So, after my husband denied the big little, I decided that he should see that mommy actually does do things other than play on the computer and hug his little brother all day. We'll see how this goes! He's already learned the words "blogging" and "networking". There will be a quiz at the end!

Friday, April 22, 2011

Dueling Poo

I know - not the most appetizing post.  But, for those who know my previous situation - this is a good post for me.  The general rule when women live together is that their "systems" sinc up and hell hath no fury for the guys that live in the house. 
Well, my little people have taken it to their own level.  This happens 3-4 times a week now.  Dueling Poo.
First, it starts with the giggle farts.  This is usually started by an unclaimed one then turns into who can do the nastiest one.  My house smells like boy.
Then, it's the mad dash to the bathroom - picture A Christmas Story, where Ralph and Randy pounce each other up the stairs on Christmas eve to see who can get into bed first.  This is the bathroom dash.
Then it's rock paper scissors with their legs crossed and hineys tucked under in order to figure out who's gonna actually go first. By now, my house smells like cesspool
Finally, I get the dimensions - "MOM!!! I MADE A HUGE POOP!!"  "LOOK AT THIS MOM!!  IT"S GINORMOUS!!"
Although, my personal favorite was the little guy the other day that told me his poop looked like a music note. (Visual - a quarter note for those in the know)
With that, my lovlies, it's time to break out the febreze and start another duel around here. 
Happy Weekend all.
I'll have a tall glass of red now.

Thursday, April 21, 2011

Easter crazy

Sunday is coming up really fast.  It's the one time a year that I actually get to break out the China and have my family over for a sit down dinner.  That's my favorite.  Sitting around a giant table (well, actually 3 tables connected oddly through my dining room and living room and after 3 years I also have matching table cloths!!) and having barbecued leg of lamb and roasted fresh ham with all the trimmings.  MMMMMmmmm...
The laughing and the stories about my grandparents start pouring out about as fast as the wine.  Nothing beats it!
We missed it last year - one kid decided to throw up in the middle of the easter egg hunt at 6AM.  By 9, I had $150 worth of groceries in my car headed to my aunt's house so she could host everyone minus us. 
This year, I am determined - Purell everywhere.  Attached to my key chain.  On the kitchen counter.  Anti-baterial wipes in the car - and thankfully, even the grocery stores provide them now!
Now, here's a story in a story.  Yesterday, we went to jiu jitsu as we do every Wednesday.  It's our routine.  Little man's class first and teacher ends it with a game of freeze tag and then big little man's class ended by a game called "steal the bacon" - don't ask - it's weird.  So, yesterday, Sensei decided to end Big Little's class differently and played his own version of dodgeball to which my big little starts crying and running over to me disappointed in himself that he is crying.  He wants to play steal the bacon - but, also, doesn't want to cry at the fact that they are not playing the game that he wanted to. (did that make sense?)
Unfortuneately, he gets that from me.  I am a creature of habit.  I do not like routine to be disturbed.  It's kinda like OCD.  Maybe it is, I don't know. 
So, when last year was disturbed by a vomiting child, I was highly disturbed.  NOT blaming the kid.  He couldn't help it that he was sick.  I get that part.  It was everything else.  I was disappointed that I wasn't cooking this huge meal and having the family around the table (now think about that butterball commercial that the guy is carving a turkey to "hallelujah" and then he's brought back to reality by a screaming baby) 
That messed me up for a while.  I was upset for my child.  I was upset for me.  It sucked. 
So, here's hoping that this year I get my sit down dinner with my lamb and ham and all the trimmings.  I hope to have all the cleaning done by the end of today so I can actually enjoy myself this weekend.  From this moment on, my children will not come in contact with any outside presense - (please don't tell them that)
The groceries are bought and thought that I would share my menu with you as a send off to a happy weekend and a Happy Easter: A crudite platter to start things lite!
BBQ leg of lamb with gravy
Roasted Fresh Ham with gravy
Mashed potatoes
Green Bean Casserole
Broccoli Casserole
BBQ sweet potatoes
Applesauce (gotta have the applesauce)
For dessert:  Bunny Cake, Boston Cream Cupcakes, Cheesecake, and Chocolate Cherry Cupcakes.

Hope that makes you a  little hungry!  Enjoy your weekend everyone.........

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Hello? Is this thing on?

Monday was my birthday. It was a fantastic day that I spent with my boys - no yelling and no arguing.  It was heaven.  Husband came home early and took me out to dinner while my aunt watched the boys for an hour.  Stuffed to the gills with cheeeeeese!  (We had mexican!)  Bought myself an ice cream cake and shared it with the boys.  Over all it was an extremely pleasant day.  It was quiet. 
So was the phone. 
That's the weird one.  My mom called in the morning.  My aunt called to make babysitting arrangements and my grandfather called because I told him to on Sunday!
That was all. 
Then I was on FaceBook.  Facebook is now the new communications system.  (Now listen carefully to this next part - I am GRATEFUL for all the WONDERFUL birthday wishes that were sent my way - this is just a realization that I came across and not a complaint!!!!)
I received over 100 birthday wishes on Facebook.  It was great - kept getting lots and lots of notifications and thought it was so sweet.  I send birthday messages all the time too!  Friends and family.  It's easy!
But, my phone only rang 3 times.  all day.  That's never happened before.  Not that my phone rings off the hook, but, I think now what everyone does is send a message and be done for the day.  I have made a decision regarding this.  If I have a phone number for the person that's being celebrated for the day - I'm making a phone call.  I am the type of person that loves to know that someone is thinking of them.  So, I am going to make every effort from now on to make my thoughts vocal to loved ones that I am thinking of them beyond the computer and texting.  It's like getting a hand written letter (remember those??)  I still insist on handwriting my Christmas cards even though there's more than I can count to take care of.  That's called planning!  So, to make the one call, even if I get an answering machine (or voice mail), I know that I made my voice heard and that I care. 
Again, NOT complaining here.  Just an observation and a new direction for me!  I love getting my facebook messages.
And I started today with a phone call to a friend......

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Rhinestone Cowboy

It was really kinda a trippy day yesterday.  Got the kids off to school like normal and then it got weird.  Yesterday and today I am on a mission to get a zillion things done because tomorrow I am having a giant hole dug in my back because of a displastic biopsy on a mole (if you haven't gone to a dermatologist lately, please make your appointment now)  So, there is going to be a hole in my back with 3 - 4 stitches (bleh) and I know that I am not going to be in the mood for anything tomorrow.  I have 2 cake orders due on Saturday, a PTA dinner, religion class and karate to all take care of in the following 72 hours.  Again, bleh.
So, back to the point of my story.  First, I ran to staples and was greeted by an over zealous geek.  I mean, really over zealous.  Like your job much?
I found what I was looking for and go to the register, which over zealous dude is the only one doing checkouts.  He starts asking me in every thesaurus way how I am doing?  Was the original question when I came in the door not enough??  I don't think anyone else was in the store when I was there.  Are you desperate for conversation??  When I tell him I'm fine and paying with debit, he then proceeds to tell me to take extra out to give him for his college fund.  BITE ME!!
1 notebook planner.  that is all.  give it to me and leave me the fuck alone.

NEXT, I went next door to Micheal's craft store.  Just needed a few cake things and candy was on sale.  Crap candy, but, the Sunday paper didn't say that.  Whilst roaming the store, I started listening to the music and it actually took me a while to realize that i was humming along to the friggin "RHINESTONE COWBOY"  (if you don't know that song, then I definately just revealed my age - which BTW - my birthday is next week and the celebrating starts friday!!)
After that and my epiphony that I was old and appalled that I still knew the words, Madonna's "Crazy for you" came on and still knew all the words (no, I am not wandering the aisles of Michael's so I can listen to the songs)  and I'm ready to get outta there!!
Go the the register and "how to save a life" comes on.  THANK GOD.  A normal song that I can get stuck in my head for the rest of the day.  Whoever hired this DJ needs to make sure his credentials weren't written in with pencil.  REally?  Is that how you play "genre" music??
Onto ULTA for their crappy sale as well - went with coupons and all set and they really meant "while supplies last" in the paper.  Holy crap it was crap.  Well,  i just saved myself $10.  Walked out with mascara for next to nothing and it still made me happy.
HMmmm, where to next?  AHh, the grocery store.  Now I was going here with a mission.  I have my religion class bringing some food to donate to the church for Easter dinners.  So, I went with all intentions of buying lots of store brand items - canned fruit and vegetables - because you can get a lot more per dollar.  Well, I couldn't believe the quality of the items that I wanted to buy.  The cans had rust on them and yet the date was stamped for next year.  That was disgusting and no one deserves that!!  So, I wasn't able to buy as much as I wanted to yesterday, but, we have enough for atleast 2 families!!
On may way home, in a double turning lane, someone decided to take an extra wide turn into my lane because she was chatting on her phone and she shoots me the "o well, F U" look.  UGH!
Drop the food off, almost forgot to bring the little person's pop-tart for his post-class snack.  (the last time I forgot his pop tart was apocolyptic!)
Head to the eyeglass store to get my new eyeglasses adjusted because they were just DIGGING into the back of my head like nobody's business and I was ready to kill someone.  The guy looks behind my ear and says - and I quote - "humph!"
Thanks eyeglass dude for your thoughtful insight.  Now do an adjustment and get my glasses back to me so I can get my kid.
Does my day stop there?? NO!! IT's only noon!!  Actually, the next couple of hours were quite nice.  Spend some snuggle time with the little one, did some laundry, cleaning, went through the mail.  Started piano lessons for the day which, for the most part, went quite smoothly.  Until the last student. 
Ever have one of those "oh God not now!!" moments??  Your stomach starts churning.  You feel the gas bubbles bubbling away like a whirlpool??  I tried adjusting the way I sat.  Inconspicuousley (?) unbottoned my top button of my pants and couldn't wait for the last 15 minutes of the lesson to be over!! 
Now it's 6:00 - nothing is prepared for dinner and I am wrapped up on the couch in a cold sweat, praying to god that I don't throw up.  WHen is my husband going to call???  Big little man keeps bringing me crackers in between WII games.  Little little man just wants to hug me and gives me his favoritist little stuffed animal to make me feel better!!  6:45 husband finally comes home.  7PM lights out to 6 this morning. 
I figured it out though.  After everything that I was trying to get done yesterday and everything for today that has to get done before the hole in the back (remember that from the beginning of this long winded story??) - that's what was sending my stomach into overdrive.  I can't stand it!  My head is always clear, but, my body does this stuff to me that is inexplicable and terribly annoying!
Well, if there's anything I figured out, it was 1)I have no idea is someone is flirting with me anymore 2)I still know the songs from my childhood 3)my kids really care (even if the care does become wii games!!)
Life is Good.
I'll let you all know tomorrow how the hell went!
Go to the dermatologist!

Friday, April 8, 2011

Haute Mom is responsible for this evil.
Muah ahh ahhh hahahhahahhaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh

Woo Hoo!! 2 in a Row!!

Thank you Thank You THank YOu to

This lovely lady caught my eye when she went on her own rant about how much her husband farts.  I was laughing so hard I was crying - go find that post on her blog!!  Since then, I feel like I really get her and love reading her posts!!  After reading it, you'll really realize the small stuff does matter!!!
I never thought I would feel such love from cyber space!  Then again, I never thought that ranting about clothes designers would get such attention either!
And now, the rules for acceptance:
  • Thank the person who gave you the award and link back to their site in your original post.
  • Tell us seven things about yourself.
  • Pass along the award to fifteen newly discovered bloggers.
  • Contact these bloggers and let them know they got this award.
Okay, so in my last post, I revealed 7 things and today, I will go for 7 more.
1:) When I was younger, I never really knew how to handle a relationship - it took me years to realize that after the initial lust wore off, there were so many more layers to being crazy in love!!
2:) My closest friends and family always used to ask me who the "flavor of the week" was - that's how horrible I was
3:) Can't even imagine my life had it turned out different.  My husband, children, the story behind us -  I truly could write a novel about my life from 1999 and on and in my head, it's a Hallmark Movie.
4:) I want to be a CHOPPED champion - or Iron CHef - my husband always loves how I "iron Chef" dinners from whatever is in the pantry
5:) I'm going to meet Duff Goldman from Ace Of Cakes sometime in my lifetime just to show him how he has inspired me in my cakes and then I'm gonna take that to Food Network Challenge and win $10,000 for the bestest cake EVER!!!!!! (If you want to see some of my creations, go to my other blog
6:) I cyber stalk John Cusack on Twitter - Have loved him since I was like, 12 years old!!  Damn!! (I'm old)
7:) Here's one that's completely off beat from everything here.  I have family in Texas.  They are my mother's side of the family - I have such love for them and yet, I only get to see them every 10 years or so - they have such different lives from me and the only way I get to keep up is from updates from my mom.  If only they knew how much I love them.........

Okay - now the tough part!  I really wanted to keep my chosen ones to the ladies that haven't been lucky enough to be recognized lately - that doesn't mean that I don't love the other blogs that I follow any less!!!
Sorry again for the messed up links - if they don't work, please, copy and paste!

Happy Weekend Everyone!

Thursday, April 7, 2011

You like me! You REALLY Like me!!

I am feeling extremely lucky the past few days!  I received the Stylish Blogger Award from Christina at

Keeping it Simple !!

I'd like to give a huge shout out to her and her adorable blog and boys!  To accept the award, you are asked to do a few things. Link back to the blogger who awarded you, share 7 things about yourself, pay it forward and award 10-15 other blogs with the award, and let those bloggers know that you gave them the award.
There are so many amazing bloggers out there, I don't know where to start!

Diary of a SnuggleSlut

From the Mudroom...

Mama's Gotta Go

Mommy Rock Out

My dishwasher's possessed!

Now, 7 things about me:
1:) I have no idea what I am doing on this computer, hence, the messed up links to the lovely ladies above.  Please, copy and paste, look them up and love them up!
2:)I carry such guilt over the most ridiculous things that it sends me to bed in terrible stomach pain.  I am now seeking medication to fix the pain, but not the brain
3:) I want lavish dinner parties.  I want a GIANT dining room table and cook 5 course meals for my friends.  Instead, we usually end up with take out and a few mags of wine and cases of beer.  Eh - we're together anyway, right?
4:)The longer that my parents live on the other side of the states, I want to move there.  I want to be near them and my brother, but, I do not have the heart to move my husband away from his family *(and he would fight me to the death to not move to the desert)
5:) I am named after my aunt (my mother's sister) who was named after a made up girl in a little story known as Peter Pan.  I am Wendie!
6:) I want to play the piano in a concert hall and not mess the music up.  I'm a nervous player even though I've been playing for 30 years, but, I would never tell my students that!
7:) I want to have enough money when we retire to continue on our "road trips" that started our romance 11 years ago.......

Friday, April 1, 2011

Screw YOU clothes designers :(

I am not skinny. In fact, I cherish my squishy arms that my children use for pillows and my squishy belly that they rest their heads on when we're stretched out on the couch. My muffin top gives me character (a quite tasty personality that sometimes needs to be taken with a grain of salt!) And with my chest size, I'm a friggin' plus sized, red headed step child of Barbie!  I have been out of high school for 20 years now (still no interest in going to the reunion, BTW) and have been a 12 for all those years. That's the same size I wore to the prom, my 27 dresses, my wedding gown, and through 2 butterball children. In fact, after #1 butterball, I put my prom gown on for Halloween and it fit perfectly still!!
So, WHY??? Why, Vera Wang?? Why, Lauren Conrad? Why, everyone who designs for Kohls? Why do you have to make me feel like a fat cow all of a sudden?? My clothes are all the same. I just wanted something nice and new for a girls night out and you shamed me to a 16 for a day!! WTF???
I get it. I was bloated for the day. But did I bloat 2 full sizes? That's some major water retention that should be held in a Guiness Record book or something. It's been a week since my clothes store visit and went out with my mom today. Guess what? I'm a 12. Atleast A.N.A designers think so! 
So, here I am ranting about shopping at my favorite store that shouldn't be my favorite store anymore I suppose since their designers hate me so much.  They do have cute shoes though..........That's where the designers would start to hate me.  The one downside to butterball 1 and 2 is that 1 foot grew.  I need 2 different shoes!  WHooPS!

Hopping THis Weekend


Copper Brick Road